1 00:00:28,590 --> 00:00:30,270 Room service, Wilberforce speaking. 2 00:00:31,270 --> 00:00:32,750 Oh, good morning, Mr. Kretzmer. 3 00:00:32,990 --> 00:00:34,730 It's Mr. Kretzmer in number six. 4 00:00:35,310 --> 00:00:37,990 Yes. You'd like breakfast in bed for two? 5 00:00:38,310 --> 00:00:40,290 Good. Coffee? Mm -hmm. 6 00:00:40,670 --> 00:00:42,650 And fried eggs? Yes. 7 00:00:43,110 --> 00:00:45,670 How would you like them, runny or congealed? 8 00:00:47,390 --> 00:00:50,270 Mm, over easy. Oh, that sounds nice. 9 00:00:51,870 --> 00:00:53,870 Yes, and what about Mrs. Kretzmer? 10 00:00:54,370 --> 00:00:56,070 She'd like a hard one. Yes, sir. 11 00:01:00,460 --> 00:01:04,340 Toast and marmalade. Right, the waitress will be up with them in a trice. 12 00:01:05,600 --> 00:01:09,180 It's no good you putting more of them up there. I've got number eight's omelette 13 00:01:09,180 --> 00:01:10,180 to do yet. 14 00:01:12,420 --> 00:01:13,880 Room service. Will before speaking. 15 00:01:14,600 --> 00:01:16,000 Oh, good morning, Mrs. Baydecker. 16 00:01:16,900 --> 00:01:18,600 You've got little bits in your teapot. 17 00:01:19,560 --> 00:01:21,400 Those are tea leaves, Mrs. Baydecker. 18 00:01:22,120 --> 00:01:24,100 We like to do it in the old -fashioned way. 19 00:01:25,130 --> 00:01:26,130 Oh, you do too? 20 00:01:26,170 --> 00:01:27,170 Good. 21 00:01:27,670 --> 00:01:31,370 If you look on your tray, you'll see a big spoon with holes in it. 22 00:01:32,330 --> 00:01:33,590 She's used it for the jam. 23 00:01:36,690 --> 00:01:39,990 I'm afraid all you can do now is suck it through clenched teeth. 24 00:01:41,850 --> 00:01:44,530 Yes, I would have a nice day, but I've got other things to do. 25 00:01:45,130 --> 00:01:47,830 Oh, don't stare at killing me. 26 00:01:48,650 --> 00:01:53,290 Miss Bloms, you'll have to take the next lotto. Why don't you use the lid? 27 00:01:53,530 --> 00:01:57,330 Because it's... Stuck with Mr. Enberg in it. 28 00:01:57,810 --> 00:02:01,790 He was on his way to the first floor bathroom and is in great distress. 29 00:02:02,870 --> 00:02:05,870 Captain Peacock is winching him down by hand. 30 00:02:06,210 --> 00:02:07,109 Oh, 31 00:02:07,110 --> 00:02:10,130 you're toast burning, Mr. Humphreys. No, the time has stuck. 32 00:02:10,949 --> 00:02:15,210 Oh, Miss Brahms, that's no way to cook an omelette. 33 00:02:16,370 --> 00:02:20,050 I'm not supposed to be the cook, I'm supposed to be the barmaid. 34 00:02:20,330 --> 00:02:22,630 Well, we're all trying to muck him together. 35 00:02:23,250 --> 00:02:24,290 But what shall I do? 36 00:02:24,520 --> 00:02:25,138 with it. 37 00:02:25,140 --> 00:02:27,400 Save it for lunch and call it Yorkshire pudding. 38 00:02:29,920 --> 00:02:34,840 Look, do you think you could possibly take this tray up to Mr Webster? Oh no, 39 00:02:34,980 --> 00:02:39,200 not him again. When I took his early morning tea up, he asked me if I'd like 40 00:02:39,200 --> 00:02:41,820 see a picture of his 20 ,000 acre cattle ranch. 41 00:02:42,040 --> 00:02:46,040 The next thing I knew, he'd lassoed me with his dressing gown cord and there 42 00:02:46,040 --> 00:02:47,320 hands all over. 43 00:02:47,540 --> 00:02:50,500 So I said, take them off. And of course he misunderstood. 44 00:02:54,190 --> 00:02:55,250 out of there at all. 45 00:02:56,070 --> 00:02:57,590 Perhaps I will just take this. 46 00:03:04,410 --> 00:03:05,410 Room service. 47 00:03:05,530 --> 00:03:06,530 Wilberforce speaking. 48 00:03:07,070 --> 00:03:08,370 Oh, good morning, Mr Conklin. 49 00:03:09,290 --> 00:03:10,550 You'd like a cold bath? 50 00:03:11,790 --> 00:03:13,290 Oh, you're in a cold bath. 51 00:03:13,850 --> 00:03:16,990 No? Well, there's been a run on hot water this morning. 52 00:03:17,230 --> 00:03:18,490 Yes, there'll be plenty tonight. 53 00:03:19,730 --> 00:03:22,470 No, that won't be much good to you at Gatwick, will it? 54 00:03:23,370 --> 00:03:26,790 Well, I... suggest you have a vigorous rub down with a rough towel. 55 00:03:28,650 --> 00:03:30,490 Well, I'm rather busy at the moment. 56 00:03:31,270 --> 00:03:32,370 I've left the blood. 57 00:03:37,150 --> 00:03:41,890 They all want the Herald Tribune and we've only got one copy. Well, give them 58 00:03:41,890 --> 00:03:44,370 page each and tell them to swap over when you bang the guard. 59 00:03:45,290 --> 00:03:50,650 I've released the elderly, Mr. Enberg, and it was very hard work. Were you in 60 00:03:50,650 --> 00:03:52,110 time? Very nearly. 61 00:03:52,640 --> 00:03:54,120 You'll find it on the first floor. 62 00:03:57,640 --> 00:03:59,940 Well, everything seems to be going quite well. 63 00:04:00,220 --> 00:04:02,540 Yeah, they seemed to enjoy themselves, didn't they? 64 00:04:02,800 --> 00:04:04,300 Thought they'd never go to bed. 65 00:04:04,780 --> 00:04:08,080 Oh, do you know, I was dead beat. Thanks ever so much for taking over the bar 66 00:04:08,080 --> 00:04:11,760 for me. Well, Danila didn't when I knew how long they were going to stay up. I 67 00:04:11,760 --> 00:04:16,339 knew it was time to close as soon as Mr Conklin looked straight at me and sang, 68 00:04:16,380 --> 00:04:19,700 it's quarter to three and there's no one in the place except you and me. 69 00:04:21,040 --> 00:04:24,670 Yeah, there was about ten... One of them sat up till well after two, guessing. 70 00:04:25,290 --> 00:04:28,070 Yes, the vegetarian dishes went down very well. 71 00:04:30,230 --> 00:04:31,890 Did anyone get any tip? 72 00:04:32,230 --> 00:04:34,230 I'm speaking for myself, not a sausage. 73 00:04:35,010 --> 00:04:37,230 I thought they were supposed to be big spinners. 74 00:04:37,450 --> 00:04:43,070 Well, as far as I can gather, most of them have got $1 ,000 and one lung, and 75 00:04:43,070 --> 00:04:44,070 they're trying to save both. 76 00:04:45,390 --> 00:04:46,390 Look at this. 77 00:04:46,510 --> 00:04:50,530 I'm out of milk and I've still got eight more trays to go up. Oh, Mr. Humphries, 78 00:04:50,570 --> 00:04:53,550 go and see if you can get Mr. Moulter to produce another jug full. 79 00:04:53,910 --> 00:04:55,690 Yeah, and I'm almost out of eggs and all. 80 00:04:56,710 --> 00:04:57,710 Oh, dear. 81 00:05:00,350 --> 00:05:02,390 Room of service, Captain Peacock Manager speaking. 82 00:05:03,350 --> 00:05:04,370 Yes, Mr. Conklin. 83 00:05:05,770 --> 00:05:07,850 I'm afraid Wilberforce is otherwise engaged. 84 00:05:09,630 --> 00:05:12,230 Well, if it gets any worse, put a cold poultice on it. 85 00:05:20,680 --> 00:05:23,680 Good morning, Mr. Humphrey. Good morning, Miss Lovelock. You're up with 86 00:05:23,680 --> 00:05:25,440 lark. Oh, I went to bed early. 87 00:05:25,840 --> 00:05:29,080 Couldn't stand the thought of polite conversation with a group of American 88 00:05:29,080 --> 00:05:31,820 oxygenarians. Have you seen Mr. Molter? 89 00:05:32,700 --> 00:05:34,000 He's gone to collect the sows. 90 00:05:34,300 --> 00:05:36,780 She's been on her honeymoon with the boar at Ivy Farm. 91 00:05:37,660 --> 00:05:38,820 We've run out of milk. 92 00:05:39,240 --> 00:05:40,920 There's a good couple of gallons there. 93 00:05:41,640 --> 00:05:42,840 That's tilling the cows. 94 00:05:43,480 --> 00:05:44,500 Come with everyone. 95 00:05:45,120 --> 00:05:47,340 Sure, she'll let you have some if you ask her nicely. 96 00:05:52,750 --> 00:05:54,010 Good morning, Betsy. 97 00:05:54,570 --> 00:05:55,570 Remember me? 98 00:05:56,310 --> 00:05:58,970 I've just come to a jug for you. You can manage it. 99 00:06:01,310 --> 00:06:04,030 I'm only a beginner, but I've got a very gentle touch. 100 00:06:05,510 --> 00:06:09,250 Now then, which one do I pull for today? 101 00:06:12,310 --> 00:06:14,610 Number two, frankly. 102 00:06:17,830 --> 00:06:20,910 Oh, I'm sorry. Yes, I know. I've got cold hands. 103 00:06:21,230 --> 00:06:23,050 Now. Take a deep breath. 104 00:06:24,810 --> 00:06:26,710 Right. Going in. 105 00:06:28,210 --> 00:06:29,210 Contact. 106 00:06:30,710 --> 00:06:33,590 How long have you been running on empty? 107 00:06:35,290 --> 00:06:37,990 Mr. Humphreys, whatever are you doing? 108 00:06:38,270 --> 00:06:42,070 We've run out of milk, and by the look of it, so has Betsy. Well, I bet she 109 00:06:42,070 --> 00:06:43,510 could tell you're a bit of a novice. 110 00:06:43,750 --> 00:06:47,990 Well, so far, my experiences have been confined to the express dairies on the 111 00:06:47,990 --> 00:06:49,870 corner. Here, you have a go. 112 00:06:50,410 --> 00:06:52,700 No. You've got to learn sometimes. 113 00:06:54,640 --> 00:06:58,020 You need a bucket. 114 00:07:01,740 --> 00:07:03,020 Thank you. Right. 115 00:07:03,280 --> 00:07:05,280 Now put your head against her side. 116 00:07:07,140 --> 00:07:12,280 She likes to think you're one of her calves. 117 00:07:13,140 --> 00:07:14,780 It's all right, Mummy. It's only me. 118 00:07:16,800 --> 00:07:18,900 There's a lot of wind going on out there. 119 00:07:19,660 --> 00:07:20,660 Sounds a vegetarian. 120 00:07:21,500 --> 00:07:26,580 They do say that the methane gas that's produced by animals is causing the 121 00:07:26,580 --> 00:07:27,580 greenhouse effect. 122 00:07:28,020 --> 00:07:31,480 Well, she's going to punch a very big hole in the ozone in a minute. 123 00:07:31,820 --> 00:07:33,660 Come on, have a go. 124 00:07:34,180 --> 00:07:36,200 It's a bit like playing the piano. 125 00:07:37,160 --> 00:07:39,100 Chaz and Dave or Richard Clayton. 126 00:07:40,920 --> 00:07:41,920 Here we go. 127 00:07:44,060 --> 00:07:45,240 Oh, I see. 128 00:07:54,379 --> 00:07:56,580 Let me know when I've got a jug full. 129 00:07:56,840 --> 00:07:57,840 Oh, no. 130 00:07:58,160 --> 00:08:00,420 Once you've darkened, you can't dark. 131 00:08:01,100 --> 00:08:03,040 I'll come back for you in ten minutes. 132 00:08:03,400 --> 00:08:04,480 Ten minutes? 133 00:08:05,960 --> 00:08:09,240 And now the overture to Beethoven's Fifth Symphony. 134 00:08:18,200 --> 00:08:21,860 Just leave it with me, madam. I'll make the necessary inquiries and let you 135 00:08:21,860 --> 00:08:22,860 know. 136 00:08:24,360 --> 00:08:26,880 Ah, good morning, Mr. Enberg, Mr. Kretzmer. 137 00:08:27,520 --> 00:08:31,860 Now, if anyone fancies a morning gallop, we have horses in the stables. 138 00:08:35,159 --> 00:08:38,720 Or if anyone fancies just looking at the horses, we can manage that as well. 139 00:08:41,140 --> 00:08:42,440 Ah, Mrs. Enberg. 140 00:08:50,350 --> 00:08:52,150 Mr. Enfrism had a nice cup of tea. 141 00:08:52,470 --> 00:08:55,870 Do you know he got two gallons out of Betsy this morning? 142 00:08:56,130 --> 00:08:57,430 It was very hard work. 143 00:08:57,690 --> 00:08:59,970 I broke the spring on my self -winding wristwatch. 144 00:09:01,230 --> 00:09:04,610 He could be a real farmer's boy if he's so minded. 145 00:09:07,410 --> 00:09:11,010 Mrs. Enberg has yet to master the mechanics of the lift. 146 00:09:11,590 --> 00:09:15,450 I can't see that lot surviving six countries in 12 days. 147 00:09:15,790 --> 00:09:19,590 When they did the Nile tour, two of them were buried in the Valley of the Kings. 148 00:09:22,790 --> 00:09:24,190 They don't have a Valley of the Queens. 149 00:09:25,010 --> 00:09:27,550 They probably do, they just haven't found it yet. 150 00:09:29,230 --> 00:09:33,470 You know, they used to bury important people with the treasured possessions 151 00:09:33,470 --> 00:09:37,210 which they would need in the next world. Oh, but they buried them too with their 152 00:09:37,210 --> 00:09:38,370 American Express car. 153 00:09:39,330 --> 00:09:40,530 There's that mouse again. 154 00:09:41,130 --> 00:09:42,330 That was the mother. 155 00:09:42,810 --> 00:09:44,850 She had foot rooflets last week. 156 00:09:45,470 --> 00:09:47,930 Cheeky thing. I think we should cement up the hole. 157 00:09:48,330 --> 00:09:50,550 Pity you threw that omelette away, Miss Ross. 158 00:09:54,700 --> 00:09:58,580 I'm just trying to muck in to help make our pension go round. 159 00:09:58,880 --> 00:10:00,740 And you're doing very well, Miss Brown. 160 00:10:01,340 --> 00:10:05,300 Now, let's look on the bright side. When the guests aren't here, we do have the 161 00:10:05,300 --> 00:10:07,000 run of the place. With the mice. 162 00:10:07,860 --> 00:10:11,400 And in the meantime, we're all having to take positions outside our normal 163 00:10:11,400 --> 00:10:13,140 experience for the good of the whole. 164 00:10:13,600 --> 00:10:14,600 There's a mouse again! 165 00:10:18,840 --> 00:10:19,840 Miss. 166 00:10:21,380 --> 00:10:22,380 Morning, all. 167 00:10:25,740 --> 00:10:28,600 Well, you've got your snouts in the trough. 168 00:10:29,460 --> 00:10:32,440 It's about your cat, Mrs. Sultum. 169 00:10:33,000 --> 00:10:37,900 Don't tell me that she's disappeared down the ivy again, the mischievous 170 00:10:37,900 --> 00:10:39,300 thing. Here she is. 171 00:10:39,880 --> 00:10:45,500 Oh, diddlers. Have you been for a walk in the pretty flower garden? 172 00:10:46,080 --> 00:10:47,039 No. 173 00:10:47,040 --> 00:10:51,200 That one -eyed ginger Tom was knocking seven bells. 174 00:10:56,780 --> 00:10:57,780 Run away? 175 00:10:58,340 --> 00:11:01,960 She chased him 100 yards before she called him. 176 00:11:02,660 --> 00:11:04,720 I'd better put her in her basket. 177 00:11:05,200 --> 00:11:07,480 I think you'd better put her on the pill, Mrs. Turner. 178 00:11:08,360 --> 00:11:10,420 When are them yanks leaving? 179 00:11:10,900 --> 00:11:13,300 This evening, Mr. Mildred. That Mr. 180 00:11:13,820 --> 00:11:15,260 Conklin's a -gordy. 181 00:11:17,880 --> 00:11:20,440 I'm just going round to lock up the sheep. 182 00:11:26,570 --> 00:11:30,390 It all seems to be going very well so far. They seem happy enough in there. 183 00:11:31,030 --> 00:11:33,970 Here's your check for the first half of the money. You'll get the second half 184 00:11:33,970 --> 00:11:36,310 when the tour leader signs the satisfaction form. 185 00:11:36,610 --> 00:11:37,810 Who is the tour leader? 186 00:11:38,010 --> 00:11:39,010 Mr. Conklin. 187 00:11:40,050 --> 00:11:42,550 Here's a leaflet outlining the rest of the day's festivities. 188 00:11:42,850 --> 00:11:44,230 I've given copies to the guests. 189 00:11:44,650 --> 00:11:48,050 There's nothing new. Just the usual events we've come to expect. You know, 190 00:11:48,050 --> 00:11:50,910 church service in the chapel and the harvest Thanksgiving dance. 191 00:11:51,130 --> 00:11:53,210 I'm sure it'll all go with the swing. Goodbye. 192 00:11:53,550 --> 00:11:55,450 The harvest Thanksgiving dance? 193 00:11:55,710 --> 00:11:56,770 Church service? 194 00:11:57,370 --> 00:11:58,370 Let's have a look. 195 00:11:58,810 --> 00:12:00,690 Sunday morning at Millstone Manor. 196 00:12:01,110 --> 00:12:04,870 Guests will attend matins in the historic Norman Chapel in the ornamental 197 00:12:04,870 --> 00:12:09,330 grounds. It was in this chapel that Hubert the Unready was buried with his 198 00:12:09,330 --> 00:12:10,350 bride, Gwendolyn. 199 00:12:10,800 --> 00:12:14,640 At four o 'clock, guests will be served tea in the garden, during which they 200 00:12:14,640 --> 00:12:18,940 will be able to observe the traditional Harvest Thanksgiving dance, which has 201 00:12:18,940 --> 00:12:21,440 been performed on this site for 200 years. 202 00:12:22,080 --> 00:12:26,000 What's all that about a church service? Nobody mentioned any church service to 203 00:12:26,000 --> 00:12:29,640 me. Since you were the one that booked the tour, one might have expected you to 204 00:12:29,640 --> 00:12:31,060 glance at the small print. 205 00:12:31,300 --> 00:12:34,840 I don't think we should worry. The local vicar will sort it all out. 206 00:12:35,160 --> 00:12:36,560 We could do it this week. 207 00:12:36,860 --> 00:12:38,840 It's doing three services already. 208 00:12:39,770 --> 00:12:42,530 There's one at Great Tender and another at Lower Tender. 209 00:12:42,730 --> 00:12:44,090 And what about the third? 210 00:12:44,430 --> 00:12:46,430 He's got tender bottoms to cope with. 211 00:12:46,990 --> 00:12:48,870 He has got his hands full, hasn't he? 212 00:12:49,450 --> 00:12:52,630 I don't think a simple country service should give us too much trouble. 213 00:12:52,910 --> 00:12:54,770 Yes, but what about the Thanksgiving dance? 214 00:12:55,370 --> 00:12:58,270 Oh, I expect Miss Moulter knows where the dancers are to be located. 215 00:12:58,630 --> 00:13:00,350 They all died years ago. 216 00:13:00,770 --> 00:13:02,610 And only me and Dad left. 217 00:13:03,590 --> 00:13:08,470 Listen, the last time we had Americans here, the hotel staff made it up. 218 00:13:08,760 --> 00:13:10,100 And no one was any the wiser. 219 00:13:10,780 --> 00:13:14,080 Well, if we want the second half of this, we'd better come up with 220 00:13:14,480 --> 00:13:17,780 Yes, we all want Mr. Conklin to be satisfied. 221 00:13:20,400 --> 00:13:21,400 Don't look at me. 222 00:13:43,600 --> 00:13:44,600 Over here. 223 00:13:45,260 --> 00:13:47,280 I'll give it a try if I'm a little pump. 224 00:13:47,780 --> 00:13:49,360 Mrs. Latham, could you oblige? 225 00:13:49,640 --> 00:13:53,820 Oh, this takes me back to when I was a land girl. 226 00:13:54,140 --> 00:13:57,440 The village smithy had an old -fashioned bellows, you know. 227 00:13:58,240 --> 00:14:02,660 We girls used to take it in turns to give him a blow to keep his furnace 228 00:14:04,080 --> 00:14:07,020 It was war work in its own way. 229 00:14:08,380 --> 00:14:10,160 I think we've got teething troubles. 230 00:14:13,560 --> 00:14:15,040 Sounds a little more fundamental. 231 00:14:16,700 --> 00:14:18,700 Give it time. It'll work its way through. 232 00:14:20,460 --> 00:14:21,460 It's coming. 233 00:14:34,380 --> 00:14:38,340 I'm sorry. It just came over me. 234 00:14:40,080 --> 00:14:41,420 Oh, this would be the one. 235 00:14:42,160 --> 00:14:46,580 Gwendolyn, aged 21, and Hubert, the unready, aged 92. 236 00:14:47,180 --> 00:14:49,660 If he wasn't ready by that time, he never would be. 237 00:14:51,200 --> 00:14:53,380 This is a lovely little church. 238 00:14:54,020 --> 00:14:55,780 Could have a smashing wedding in here. 239 00:14:57,120 --> 00:14:59,840 Do you mean me personally or people in general? 240 00:15:00,460 --> 00:15:03,460 Well, that Mavis, she has got her eye on you. 241 00:15:03,740 --> 00:15:05,900 She gave me a very funny look in bed last night. 242 00:15:06,580 --> 00:15:08,840 Does anything, you know, uh... 243 00:15:12,400 --> 00:15:13,780 Well, you could tell me, you know. 244 00:15:14,640 --> 00:15:19,360 Miss Browns, would you like the answer as a gentleman or as a cad? 245 00:15:19,620 --> 00:15:20,800 Oh, as a gentleman, of course. 246 00:15:21,200 --> 00:15:23,260 Well, as a gentleman, nothing. 247 00:15:23,780 --> 00:15:25,880 As a cad, ditto. 248 00:15:27,720 --> 00:15:31,040 Doesn't she make any demands on you? 249 00:15:32,120 --> 00:15:34,140 She's a bit selfish with her hot water bottle. 250 00:15:34,520 --> 00:15:37,540 Does she make any demands on her? 251 00:15:38,520 --> 00:15:39,520 Definitely not. 252 00:15:40,000 --> 00:15:41,000 We're pals. 253 00:15:43,210 --> 00:15:47,010 Tell you what, between you and me, Miss Dumfries, there's thousands of women 254 00:15:47,010 --> 00:15:48,350 looking for a man like you. 255 00:15:48,630 --> 00:15:50,510 Miss Brown, do me a favour. 256 00:15:51,330 --> 00:15:52,630 Don't tell them where I live. 257 00:15:56,250 --> 00:15:58,990 The good books open at a rather appropriate place. 258 00:15:59,470 --> 00:16:02,250 It is more blessed to give than to receive. 259 00:16:03,070 --> 00:16:05,350 An air full of that might encourage the tips. 260 00:16:06,920 --> 00:16:09,620 I could play pennies from heaven quietly in the background. 261 00:16:10,000 --> 00:16:13,000 You'll have to get somebody else to pump. I've done me back in. 262 00:16:13,680 --> 00:16:16,840 Mind you, I did the same at the blacksmith's. 263 00:16:18,000 --> 00:16:24,020 Well, we've got the organ, the hymn books, the pews, and we're steeped in 264 00:16:24,020 --> 00:16:25,020 country atmosphere. 265 00:16:26,320 --> 00:16:28,560 All we're short of is an old country vicar. 266 00:17:52,909 --> 00:17:54,990 with a prayer. 267 00:17:57,670 --> 00:17:58,670 How's that? 268 00:18:01,210 --> 00:18:04,830 I hope you do. 269 00:18:06,510 --> 00:18:08,830 A lot of food left over. 270 00:18:09,170 --> 00:18:10,170 Didn't they like it? 271 00:18:10,590 --> 00:18:11,830 Half of them can't chew. 272 00:18:12,770 --> 00:18:14,950 The ultra pudding's practically intact. 273 00:18:15,270 --> 00:18:16,270 Put it in the bucket. 274 00:18:17,870 --> 00:18:19,370 The apple crumble went well. 275 00:18:19,570 --> 00:18:21,870 Well, at least they can suck the apple out of it. 276 00:18:22,310 --> 00:18:23,310 Any tips? 277 00:18:23,570 --> 00:18:25,830 Nothing. Anything for me? 278 00:18:26,230 --> 00:18:27,390 Oh, yes, Daddy, yes. 279 00:18:28,370 --> 00:18:32,530 I'd say he's paid quite well. Surely he doesn't have to live on scraps. 280 00:18:32,950 --> 00:18:34,770 He feeds them to the animals. 281 00:18:35,250 --> 00:18:37,170 How did they like my sermon? 282 00:18:37,510 --> 00:18:40,230 It went down very well. They were fast asleep in three minutes. 283 00:18:41,110 --> 00:18:46,030 Mind you, Mr. Conklin stirred a little when you mentioned Sodom and Gomorrah. 284 00:18:47,400 --> 00:18:52,680 Well, like you told me, I done that bit about it being better to give than to 285 00:18:52,680 --> 00:18:53,680 receive. 286 00:18:54,620 --> 00:19:01,120 What profiteth a man that he liveth in a house of gold if he 287 00:19:01,120 --> 00:19:05,100 crieth at night on his pillow of silk? 288 00:19:05,600 --> 00:19:09,700 Cause his bed be empty and he haveth no friend. 289 00:19:10,620 --> 00:19:11,620 Whyeth not? 290 00:19:12,060 --> 00:19:14,680 Cause he don't come across with the tips. 291 00:19:16,740 --> 00:19:17,960 Very subtly put. 292 00:19:18,280 --> 00:19:21,820 What have you done with the money you got when you passed round the hat for 293 00:19:21,820 --> 00:19:25,000 collection? Church don't work for nothing, you know. 294 00:19:26,420 --> 00:19:27,920 You asked the Pope. 295 00:19:28,740 --> 00:19:31,160 You all think you want to chuck it in the kitchen? 296 00:19:31,600 --> 00:19:33,160 Yes, a share of that should be ours. 297 00:19:33,500 --> 00:19:37,900 You will all feel better giving than receiving. 298 00:19:41,040 --> 00:19:42,080 about his money as dad. 299 00:19:42,360 --> 00:19:43,360 So we've noticed. 300 00:19:43,780 --> 00:19:47,040 Quite a few ladies in the village would like to get their hands on what he's got 301 00:19:47,040 --> 00:19:48,040 tucked away. 302 00:19:48,760 --> 00:19:50,520 Takes all sorts to make a world. 303 00:19:51,060 --> 00:19:53,160 He likes you, Mrs. Slocum. 304 00:19:53,400 --> 00:19:57,680 He's got an old stuffed pike in a glass case, what he caught in the gravel pit 305 00:19:57,680 --> 00:19:58,680 the day he met you. 306 00:19:59,020 --> 00:20:01,900 He says he thinks of you every time he looks at it. 307 00:20:03,500 --> 00:20:05,580 Where's the romantic thought, Mrs. Slocum? 308 00:20:06,180 --> 00:20:08,180 He's thinking of having it re -stuffed. 309 00:20:08,510 --> 00:20:10,290 It didn't bother on my account. 310 00:20:11,150 --> 00:20:12,150 Quick, quick. 311 00:20:12,190 --> 00:20:13,190 It's an emergency. 312 00:20:14,170 --> 00:20:15,109 It's Mr. 313 00:20:15,110 --> 00:20:18,250 Enberg. The last time I saw him, he'd fallen asleep in his apple crumble. 314 00:20:18,690 --> 00:20:20,790 No, well, he woke up. His top set's missing. 315 00:20:21,530 --> 00:20:24,410 Mrs. Enberg reckons they're stuck in one of them bread rolls. 316 00:20:24,830 --> 00:20:26,170 Good heavens, the scraps. 317 00:20:26,510 --> 00:20:27,890 Well, Dad took them for the goat. 318 00:20:41,450 --> 00:20:45,250 I've just emptied them in the tub for the billy goat. Mr. Moulton, Mr. 319 00:20:45,570 --> 00:20:46,870 Enberg's lost his upper set. 320 00:20:47,070 --> 00:20:49,030 He thinks they're still biting a bread roll. 321 00:20:49,490 --> 00:20:52,510 You can persuade the goat to take a short break. We'll see if we can recover 322 00:20:52,510 --> 00:20:55,390 them. Hey, get back, get back! Not when he's eating! 323 00:20:56,210 --> 00:20:58,190 Couldn't you pull him off with his chain? 324 00:20:58,510 --> 00:20:59,630 Not when he's eating. 325 00:21:00,010 --> 00:21:01,810 He's a devil when he's eating. 326 00:21:02,210 --> 00:21:04,230 He'll have me with them horns of his. 327 00:21:04,670 --> 00:21:07,710 Well, if he's swallowed them, we're not likely to see them until they've left 328 00:21:07,710 --> 00:21:08,710 for Gatwick. 329 00:21:10,380 --> 00:21:11,380 Value is a reward. 330 00:21:11,680 --> 00:21:13,560 Old teeth ain't worth much. 331 00:21:13,860 --> 00:21:17,680 Well, these were made by top New York dentists. They cost over $10 ,000. 332 00:21:18,340 --> 00:21:22,660 Well, I'll go and get me gun and you lot hold him by his chain. 333 00:21:23,240 --> 00:21:28,180 You can't shoot the goat just because of Mr. Enberg's dentures. Now, all of you 334 00:21:28,180 --> 00:21:29,660 go over there and attract his attention. 335 00:21:30,000 --> 00:21:32,400 I'll nip in, grab the trough and run away. 336 00:21:32,760 --> 00:21:34,400 It's that military training again. 337 00:21:40,460 --> 00:21:42,060 You made a noise like a nanny goat. 338 00:21:42,360 --> 00:21:45,320 Oh, yes. How did it go, Mrs. Slocum? You were a lamb goat. 339 00:21:48,880 --> 00:21:50,920 It's very good. His ears have twitched. 340 00:21:51,380 --> 00:21:52,740 I'm going to get me gun. 341 00:21:53,400 --> 00:21:56,520 No, Mr. Bolton. In no circumstances will you get the gun. 342 00:22:02,420 --> 00:22:03,420 That's good. That's good. 343 00:22:22,510 --> 00:22:23,790 They're all asleep in the lounge. 344 00:22:24,110 --> 00:22:28,050 Mr Embo's got his teeth back in and he's smiling with them. Any ill effects? 345 00:22:28,550 --> 00:22:30,470 Well, his breath smells faintly of Milton. 346 00:22:31,610 --> 00:22:33,990 And he says they don't fit so well. 347 00:22:34,250 --> 00:22:37,050 I'm not surprised that goat used them on his first call. 348 00:22:38,050 --> 00:22:40,170 Did he say anything about the reward money? 349 00:22:40,610 --> 00:22:44,010 No, he seems to have had a successful memory bypass on that subject. 350 00:22:44,290 --> 00:22:45,910 Oh, come on, you lot. 351 00:22:46,330 --> 00:22:50,470 Not good you messing round here with that dance to think about. 352 00:22:51,040 --> 00:22:54,800 And then we've got to get the table and chairs out on the lawn. And we've got to 353 00:22:54,800 --> 00:22:55,800 set the tea. 354 00:22:55,900 --> 00:22:57,780 I was about to suggest that. 355 00:22:58,680 --> 00:23:03,840 Are you not rather exceeding your authority as a bellboy, Mr. Rumble? 356 00:23:04,600 --> 00:23:08,800 Captain Peacock, the fact that I'm wearing this uniform has no effect on my 357 00:23:08,800 --> 00:23:12,660 authority. It's difficult to take you seriously wearing that silly hat. 358 00:23:19,400 --> 00:23:20,660 Let's put this one under that tree. 359 00:23:21,020 --> 00:23:22,700 Oh, that's no good, little rumpet. 360 00:23:23,040 --> 00:23:24,040 It's full of pigeons. 361 00:23:24,500 --> 00:23:27,060 And these teaclocks, they're only just back from the laundry. 362 00:23:27,640 --> 00:23:29,820 Oh, careful now. 363 00:23:30,300 --> 00:23:33,820 Do you know, my legs have gone all wobbly. I'm not used to all this leaping 364 00:23:33,820 --> 00:23:36,100 about. Are you sure you remember all the steps? 365 00:23:36,340 --> 00:23:37,800 Oh, yes, I remember them. 366 00:23:38,180 --> 00:23:39,820 I'm just not sure when to do them. 367 00:23:40,160 --> 00:23:43,300 Well, I'll be doing the calls in between playing my trumpet. 368 00:23:43,960 --> 00:23:45,000 Do you play the trumpet? 369 00:23:45,640 --> 00:23:47,380 I played it since I was 12. 370 00:23:48,270 --> 00:23:49,770 I'm full of surprises, aren't I? 371 00:23:50,570 --> 00:23:51,710 One after another. 372 00:23:52,570 --> 00:23:55,990 I'm also the champion kisser. Are you? 373 00:23:56,470 --> 00:23:59,250 At the village state, I run the kissing booth. 374 00:23:59,630 --> 00:24:01,130 I sell them for a shilling. 375 00:24:01,750 --> 00:24:03,010 I have my own sign. 376 00:24:03,690 --> 00:24:05,430 Mavis is willing for a shilling. 377 00:24:06,710 --> 00:24:08,810 I look forward to you playing the trumpet. 378 00:24:10,710 --> 00:24:13,450 It's very good of you to muck in, so to speak, and help us. 379 00:24:13,750 --> 00:24:16,430 Well, I do admire the way you've taken charge of everything. 380 00:24:17,280 --> 00:24:20,400 When I first met you, I thought you were a bit of an old stick in the mud. 381 00:24:20,640 --> 00:24:22,340 First impressions can be most misleading. 382 00:24:22,660 --> 00:24:26,180 You've no idea the number of fluttering hearts you've caused among the female 383 00:24:26,180 --> 00:24:27,180 members of the tour. 384 00:24:27,320 --> 00:24:28,320 Really? 385 00:24:28,360 --> 00:24:30,680 They say you remind them of a film star. 386 00:24:31,000 --> 00:24:32,400 No, you don't say. 387 00:24:32,680 --> 00:24:33,680 Who was it now? 388 00:24:33,980 --> 00:24:36,040 Oh, yes, I remember Ronald Coleman. 389 00:24:36,400 --> 00:24:38,960 Oh, what? I never saw him. 390 00:24:39,260 --> 00:24:40,320 Oh, you must have done. 391 00:24:40,960 --> 00:24:46,040 Prisoner of Zender, Lost Horizon, Random Harvest, Pale of Two Cities. 392 00:24:46,920 --> 00:24:51,140 It is a far, far better thing I do than I have ever done. 393 00:24:51,520 --> 00:24:52,680 Oh, was that him? 394 00:24:52,920 --> 00:24:54,540 Granny was mad about him. 395 00:24:55,560 --> 00:24:58,920 The clouds been lying down all afternoon. 396 00:24:59,400 --> 00:25:00,400 Well, so have the guests. 397 00:25:01,540 --> 00:25:04,220 The swallows is flying low, too. 398 00:25:04,700 --> 00:25:06,340 Not over the tables, I trust. 399 00:25:06,680 --> 00:25:09,200 I don't fancy the look of that sky. 400 00:25:10,100 --> 00:25:15,260 When the clouds is all streaky, it'll rain for a weekie. 401 00:25:16,040 --> 00:25:18,280 Never thought much of these old country sayings. 402 00:25:18,480 --> 00:25:19,860 Pure superstition. 403 00:25:45,710 --> 00:25:50,450 the weather and that, we can't do the Avis Dance outdoors, but so you will.